When your world crumbles ... maybe?

Being a Princess Warrior for Christ is an amazing thing. Yet even royalty can experience trauma, trials, and tribulation. God's Word tell us we will indeed experience troubles in this fallen world. Life happens. Sometimes hard stuff comes from our enemy, other times, it's the consequences of our sin, and oftentimes it is simply life as life happens. Ultimately, the solution is the same: Cling to Christ.

Recently, I promised you another entry about the Alice in Wonderland movie, however, this was not what I'd planned to post, but I believe God knows what He is doing and exactly what I'm supposed to share. So ...

One thing that I am very clear about when speaking, counseling, and sharing with others is the importance of being honest and transparent. In other words, we need to "tell on ourselves" and allow what's real to be seen. Hiding never solves anything. Faith and friendship does.

I have been informed that there is a 50/50 chance that I will no longer have a job after June. My "day job" is funded by a grant, which means without the funding, I am off the payroll (to put it plainly). I love this job. I love helping others find success and hope. To top things off, this job has great insurance and benefits, something not easy to find anymore. Second issue -- my family is unable to afford our home and will likely be moving. Finally, my precious mother, who lives with us, has been experiencing health challenges. She is my best friend. I cannot imagine my life without her. I've been worried, depressed, and struggling this past month.

Do I think my problems are greater than anyone else's? Absolutely not. I share them with the hope you will pray for our King's favor and provision for my family. But, more importantly, so we can examine the importance of faith during trying times. Times when tears come easily and fears run rampant. Times when the future seems bleak and it's difficult to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Times when God is moving on our behalf, in unexpected ways, behind the scenes, but when He seems so far away.

Alice, in Alice in Wonderland, experienced a major crisis of faith. She ended up in an unfamiliar place with unfamiliar inhabitants, some that wanted to help her, others who wished to destroy her. The helpful ones were a bit odd, to say the least. Her greatest support came from a hatter gone mad. Through most of the story, our dear Alice was not only lacking faith in herself, but had little faith in those around her.

Through a series of insane events, Alice slowly learns to trust The Hatter and his unruly group of misfits. Even though the enemy seems much bigger and badder, Alice finally embraces her calling and has faith that she will prevail. Moving forward is no longer an option; it is her destiny.

We, too, can end up facing circumstances that are beyond our control. Bad things happen. Life happens. We can end up frightened, fumbling, and freaked out. Believe me. I know. I've been there a lot lately. Like Alice, we can choose to fight or we can run, hide, and hope it will all just "go away." I hate to admit that I've done some hiding and hoping I'll wake up and everything will be okay in the morning.

Unfortunately, life usually doesn't work like that. We have to act. We have to believe. We have to keep dreaming. And, most importantly, we have to trust and have faith in God. He promises to give us a hope and a future, and as Carrie Underwood's latest song so perfectly states: This is our TEMPORARY HOME. We can rest in the knowledge that there is a whole new world that awaits us. This is a temporary place, an eternal home with Christ is our ultimate destiny.

I've discovered several practical steps that are helping me walk through this process of change.

1. Speak God's truth. Speak Scripture aloud, proclaiming God's promises. This works great when the negative thinking and fearful thoughts become overwhelming.
2. Pray. Continue to talk to God about everything. He says we can approach Him with freedom and confidence. King David talked to God about everything, good and bad. We can too.
3. Worship. That's right. Keep praising Jesus. This is the hardest step for me. I feel phony singing praises when I'm quite frankly a little mad at God and my circumstances. But when I do it, well, it works. I am encouraged and find just enough faith to continue on.
4. Enlist others. Thankfully, I have people in my life that will listen to me vent and who understand my fears. Dealing with life alone isn't what God wants for us. Healthy relationships are crucial in a crisis. In fact, they're key to a successful life.
5. Take action. Do little things that help your situation. For example, talk to a financial counselor if you're struggling with making ends meet. Start looking for a new job before the current one is history. Continue to take care of the basics like good self-care. Get enough sleep, eat right, and exercise. (I haven't been as diligent with "the take care of self" part) But now that I've "told on myself," I better get busy!

Like Alice, in her Wonderland adventure, we must suit up and show up for our lives, even when our world is crumbling beneath our feet. Who knows? Maybe it's not really crumbling at all. Maybe God is going to take us to a whole new level of living. Maybe it will actually end up better.

No matter, as followers of Christ, and Princess Warriors, we can rest assured that in the end, it will be for our benefit. God knows what's best for His children. Let us continue to Cling to Christ, one step and a prayer at a time.

Redemption: Is it real?

For my Easter article visit: http://powertochange.com/discover/faith/goodfriday/

The next "Alice in Wonderland" study is coming soon. Have a blessed Easter, Princess Warriors.

Afraid to fight? Do it anyway.

Blessings Princess Warriors. I'm so excited to share my latest blog entry. I hope that you too will feel encouraged, blessed, even challenged, by the following message.

First, I'll admit I'm a big Johnny Depp fan, and, in most cases, I go to all the movies he stars in. I think he's a fabulous actor. Okay. Okay. I think he's quite (incredibly) good looking as well. (That's my big confession!)

Anyway ... I recently took my daughter to the new Alice in Wonderland, starring none other than Mr. Johnny Depp as the Mad Hatter.

We both enjoyed the movie and its amazing 3D effects. But later, back home, I found myself rewinding and reviewing the movie over and over in my head. One scene in particular kept coming to mind. (Beware! This contains some tiny spoilers, although, I doubt reading will ruin your movie experience.)

Let me just mention that through a majority of the movie, Alice refused to accept her identity and her destiny. She simply could not grasp that she had a great calling on her life and that the inhabitants of Wonderland saw her as a savior of sorts. Even when she actually embraced the truth, she wouldn't accept her mission. She was afraid. But, who wouldn't be? Her task wasn't simple, nor was it typical for a young woman.

Alice was asked to trade her frilly dress for a coat of armor and a sword. Her destiny required her to slay a monstrous beast that struck unparalleled terror in the hearts and minds of Wonderland's many strange creatures. Frightened of the possible outcome, Alice fled from the hopeful onlookers, torrents of tears cascading down her pretty, young face.

After sharing her concerns with one very wise and very ancient caterpillar, and listening to his thoughtful council, she returns dressed in full armor, fierce determination etched across her face, the tears long gone.

I won't tell you how it all turns out, but our movie heroine's acceptance of her God-given identity and her daring destiny, serve as powerful reminders of our own destinies as daughters of the King.

We, too, may feel less than perfect and unprepared (that's okay; we are). We may be afraid of what God is asking us to do (no problem; we can do "it" afraid). And we might not be sure what to do (no worries; God and the people He selects to guide us will know). Like Alice, we, too, have our own armor and sword, for God provides spiritual armor for His warriors to wear. That means us! In other words, He gives us everything we need to meet the challenges we face.

We can be who we're created to be and do what we're called to do. Amen!

Right now, simply be reminded of who you are in Christ, and know you can accomplish any mission, no matter how scary it might at first appear. God keeps His promises. It's up to us to take Him at His Word.

For encouragement, why not read about how Moses, scared and argumentative, was initially too frightened to be who he was and do what God required him to do. Or consider Ruth -- a woman in mourning. A woman who was willing to become a princess warrior and walk boldly forward with Naomi to a whole new land, and, ultimately, an unexpected, history-altering destiny. Can anyone say lineage of Christ? Or ... maybe it's time to reread the story of Mary, a peasant girl who became a princess warrior and gave birth to our Savior.

God's love letters give us one example after another of men and women who were unsure who they were and what they were supposed to do. They were afraid, angry, confused, and sinful. Yet, God used them to change the world -- forever.

We can change our world too. Sometimes we wear our princess gowns and other times we need to armor up. Will we be afraid as Alice was? Absolutely! But, like Alice, we can conquer our fear and raise our swords, expecting victory in Christ.

I'm sure you remember that old Nike slogan: "Just do it!" Sometimes we will make a very significant statement by our actions. That's right. We may be fearful, but with God's help, we'll feel the fear and move forward anyway. We'll Just Do It.

Psalm 27:1 says: "The LORD is my light and salvation; whom shall I fear? The LORD is the strength of my life; Of whom shall I be afraid?" (NIV)

Isaiah 41:13: "For I am the Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you. (NIV)

God bless you, sisters. Let us Armor Up and become battle ready. For with our King, nothing is impossible.

Check back soon, because I'm not yet finished with this whole Alice in Wonderland comparison. There's just so much "good stuff" from the movie that relates to our growth as Princess Warriors for Christ.

"Heaven Hunger"

Greetings to all God's girls! I have an exciting and challenging message to share with you. I hope you are as touched as I was when God revealed this simple phrase to me in a parking lot outside The Mall. Yes, the shopping mall that I was visiting in Vancouver, Washington, this weekend with my daughter. The phrase is: Heaven Hunger.

First, a little background. I am always drawn to what we now refer to as "bling." Yes, bling-bling, anything shiny, glittery, gleaming, colorful, vibrant, breathtaking, both natural and not.

A beautiful landscape and a pair of rhinestone earrings both have the capacity to dazzle me. I also have to admit that I have a soft spot for STUFF. Yes, stuff. Things. Items. Pretties. Bobbles. STUFF. Too much of the time the stuff that I'm drawn to costs money. Not necessarily a lot, but money that I don't really need to be spending.

Okay, you say, that makes sense, Carol, you're a woman. We like to shop. Most of us anyway. Pretty things catch our attention. Nothing strange with that, right? Well, I guess it depends how you look at it. And why you want the stuff to begin with.

First, let me be very open. I won't go into details, but I have not always been wise with my finances. In fact, I'm working to get out of debt. I like to buy things for you, me, and everybody. This is not a good habit when it conflicts with God's goals for your life, not to mention, puts a major dent in your pocketbook. I think there is something deeper than a shopping addition going on, not that overspending can't be a serious enough issue in itself.

But, consider this: God created us with our senses. Sight. Smell. Hearing. Touch. Taste.

Stay with me! I promise this will be more than a summary of our senses.

For starters, this weekend I spent money on the following things/activities/stuff. Money that could have been used to pay bills and help others. But I was on a quest. Here's my list:

1. Purchased deliciously fragrant lotion, bodywash, and spray from the place where I can't comfortably fit into their underwear anymore. Did you figure it out? Victoria's Secret. I didn't care about the lacy undergarments anyway. I was lost in the tantalizing fragrances and succumbed to my desire to have those yummy smells with me at home and on my body. Fed my sense of smell.

2. Me and my daughter (both with weight challenges) shared a huge peppermint marshmallow creamy sundae thingy at Boppin Bobs. The taste and textures were so enticing and enjoyable that I continued to indulge far after my actual body hunger had past. Fed my sense of taste.

3. At another retailer, I was bombarded by glittery, rhinestone, costume jewelry. I'm talking some major bling. I couldn't seem to resist a giant ring full of shiny glittery stones. In fact, even while driving home, I couldn't stop staring at my ring finger. Of course, I cut the tag right off and wore my purchase home so I could enjoy the shimmery sensations. Fed my sense of sight.

4. Went, like half of America, to see Alice in Wonderland 3D (Good movie by the way). Fed my desire for incredible sights and images and sounds.

I'm not going to list everything I did, but are you getting the picture here? There were also plenty of things that I was drawn to and ignored. I did say NO! a lot, but, obviously, not to everything. It seemed as if I was hungry for for certain things. I was ravenous for these beautifully created items, tasty treats, exciting images... are you with me, ladies?

I've spoken a lot about how we all have hungry hearts that hunger and thirst for the One Thing that will sustain them -- Jesus Christ. I also realized as I was driving away from the mall, we have another hunger that is built into us, tied into the One Thing.

Feeling a little guilty about what I did purchase, I was talking to God, and the two words I heard were: Heaven Hunger.

I explained to my daughter what I was thinking. How we are drawn to beauty, both those things in nature and that are created. Things that sparkle, shine, and smell good. Flowers, a baby's cheeks, a flashy handbag, a colorful painting, a lovely throw rug, pristine sandy beaches, white snow-covered mountains, puppies and baby kitty cats. And that's just the eye candy stuff, I didn't even highlight the sound of crashing waves, cry of a seagull, strings in a symphony, or, the wonderful feeling of a rabbit's fur, a puppy's tongue licking your cheek, a hug from a loved one. I could go on and on and on.

Why? Well, I believe that God was reminding me that this isn't my home. Not my permanent one anyway. I have a strong "heaven hunger" that desires the incredible, supernatural, awesomeness of Heaven.

Think about it.

The Bible talks about streets of gold, and beautifully blinding jewels that we've never laid eyes on. A new Heaven and a New Earth. As if sunsets and diamonds aren't already glorious enough.

What will make this heavenly home so beautiful is God Himself. His glory will be beyond our now limited imaginings. Our senses will be flooded with His glory and highly inventive creations. I believe we long for this place of ultimate beauty. For there, we will finally find the fulfilment that we never quite experienced here on this fallen and imperfect planet.

Even as Christians, who taste God's goodness now, we will be absolutely stunned by the avalanche of His greatness featured in everything we see, smell, touch, taste, and hear.

Get this! According to His Word, we will feast on fine foods (without gaining weight) have rooms in our very own mansions, and walk down streets of gold so pure it's like walking on glass! They'll even be gates of pearls. I can't wait to see this jasper stone that John mentions in the Book of Revelation. My point: I'm hungry for heaven. God loves to create and surround Himself with beauty. We, princess warriors, are royalty created in His image. Why wouldn't we want the same?

Now, before you think I'm giving approval for us to race off on a quest to gather all the beautiful STUFF we can, let's think again.

I need to tell you something huge. Something you have more than likely experienced yourselves. After my day of seeing, smelling, tasting, feeling, and hearing of this world, I was left even more hungry for His home. That's right. No matter how shiny the ring, how cute the baby, how lovely the seashore, how tasty the Thanksgiving turkey or hot fudge sundae, NONE OF IT IS LASTING or ETERNAL. It is but a substitute of what awaits us in our future heavenly home.

We're back again to the "real deal" stuff. Reigning real as princess warriors, we must understand that everything here, right now, is but a dim substitute of what is yet to come.

If we expect an old black and white film to have the same degree of technical definition as Avatar in 3D, we will be sorely disappointed. So it is with this temporary place we call home.

Once again, I'm brought back to the fact that nothing or no one will every satisfy me here and now except my Heavenly King. My yearnings for Heaven are real and expected, but I am wasting my time and money if I think I can buy a piece of that heavenly real-estate now.

So, what are we to do? Continue to keep our eyes focused on the Author and Perfector of our Faith -- Jesus Christ. Spend our time collecting the heavenly rewards that we can enjoy forever in Heaven.

Just like when we're far from home, we yearn for it. I suspect that we will continue to long for Heaven until that moment in time when Jesus takes us in His arms and says, "Welcome home, good and faithful servant. Enter your reward."

Please, don't you dare stop enjoying sunsets, sundaes, and sapphires, just remember there is far more to come. This is but a taste of the true treasure. Stay focused on the real prize, princesses. With our eyes on Jesus we are surely headed the right direction.

God bless you all.

For some great reading about our heavenly home, consider:

Heaven by Randy Alcorn
Heaven by Joni Earechson Toda
The best option: The Bible by God

As the Revelation of John describes Heaven:

It shown with the glory of God, and its brilliance was like that of a very precious jewel, like jasper, clear as crystal. Revelation 21:11 NIV

This woman, Diane, has taken time on her site to list a ton of scriptures related to Heaven and the afterlife. You may want to visit.

http://dianedew.com/heaven.htm

Until next time ...

Friends who bite your back -- Leave Teeth Marks

Hello ... Princess Warriors!

Before I get started on our topic of the day, I wanted to take a moment and invite you to listen to my recent radio guest appearance. This past Saturday, February 20 to be exact, I had the privilege of discussing Princess Warriors for Christ on the radio program: Let's Talk with Stacy and Hutch, on WORD FM 101.5 Pittsburgh -- a long way from Oregon. They were three hours ahead, so sleepy-head-me had to be up and kicking at 6:00 AM my time to take the call from the studio producer. Ugh! Thankfully, with God all things truly are possible. Me up early on a Saturday is indeed a major miracle.

To listen, go directly to the Let's Talk Radio Show's previously recorded messages, that will of course include the Princess Warrior segment, Click here: http://www.northway.org/secondary/care/stacyandhutch/stacyandhutch.aspx

When you arrive on the page, you will see the blurb for the radio show. Below that are the dates and topics. Just added, at the top of the list, are the links for the Princess Warrior show. It is not yet titled, but the date is clearly marked. And, off to the right side, you will see a column that says -- LISTEN -- my portion of the show is Part B.

If you click the link you will hear our Princess Warrior Discussion. (please note that the hosts talk briefly following a commercial break before I'm actually on the air) And if you have time, I highly recommend listening to the program (there are several parts with different guests) in its entirety, and then, when time allows, check out their other weekly topics. Great Themes! They deal with real life "stuff" for those of us who are fighting to reign real. Just what we need! Amen!?

MOVING ON ...

On a much different note (a terribly sad one) is the current major headline about a Killer Whale named Tillicum (meaning friend) who pulled his longtime trainer and human friend into his tank at Sea World, killing her in the process.

Now this isn't a blog entry to discuss how we feel about animals in captivity. There are plenty out there for that. I'm actually using this tragic story to segway into another tragedy that can be deadly in its own unique way. Though not likely to kill your physical being, the issue we're exploring can certainly play a significant roll in killing your trust, your relationships, and your faith in others, even God.

I want to believe that Tillicum didn't intend to kill his trainer of ten years when he pulled her into the water. Although, I can't possibly know what goes on in the head of anyone or anything. Only God knows that. Sadly, though, whatever the reason, lives were forever altered. Not only was the woman's family, friends, and coworkers impacted by this horrific event, but also the men, women, and children in the stands were deeply traumatized by what they witnessed. Surely, their lives will be changed forever after seeing such tragedy unfold before them. It was definitely not what they expected. Dawn, his trainer, most certainly didn't expect it as she stroked and played with the familiar animal.

When I read this story, I started thinking about an issue that has caused problems for many women -- both believer and non-believer alike. No one is immune. Only by the grace of God can we rise above this problem. So, what am I talking about? Maybe some of you have already figured it out. The picture above gives a clue. It shows two princesses on either side of a road, a road that leads to one castle. Two princesses, one castle. Hum? Are they a team? Sisters? Maybe friends? For our purposes today, I'm going to say friends. They are both daughters of the King and are traveling the same narrow road to reach their future heavenly home.

What happens when one princess turns on the other? It may not be obvious at first, maybe they've ended up on opposite sides of the road because there is a division between them. Maybe the "G" word got in the way.

Ladies, there is a "G" word -- GOSSIP -- that can reap havoc on our relationships. It is especially painful when the back biting takes place between two friends. When we take our words, and use them like a sword to stab our sisters where it hurts most -- in the back and through the heart, we not only harm ourselves and our friend, we can end up traumatizing those around us.

Gossip, lies, backstabbing all seem to grow. The impact is felt like the aftershocks of an earthquake. People take sides, and battle lines are drawn. Instead of fighting together against our common enemy, we end up fighting amongst ourselves.

The devil just stands back and cheers. He doesn't have to lift a finger. We're the ones raising weapons to wound other warriors.

As Christians, we can even use the Bible, God's truth, as a tool of destruction.

I have a feeling you know what I mean. For example, Julie confessed to her good friend, Jonie, that she has been yelling at her children. She admits to letting the sun go down on her anger, a lot. She requests prayer from Jonie and shares about her struggles in confidence. Jonie, who has struggled with similar problems, suddenly feels a little better about herself as she has improved in this area. For some reason, she is compelled to tell another friend about Julie's confession. Jonie reasons that she is gathering prayer support and really needs advice on how to best support Julie. Get the picture. So the cycle continues. Pretty soon, Julie uncovers the knife in her back, which is now piercing her heart. She becomes disillusioned with her Christian friends, who are all discussing her issues, and she stops attending church. After all, she came to The Church to find true friends, people she could trust. Instead, it's exactly the same gossiping mess she experiences in the world.

And we wonder why so many people avoid Christians, referring to us as judgemental, hypocritical, and worse. Sadly, sometimes we are those very things. I know I've been that and more. I've also been on the receiving end of such treatment. I'm sure I don't have to tell you that it doesn't feel good to be gossipped about.

Friends, we are daughters of the King of Kings. We are to be an example to a hurting and lost world. We are to be set apart, not the same, but different -- holy.

Loyalty to others is a quality every Princess Warrior should exhibit. I know I need to. And not just sometimes, with some people, but all the time, with all people. Granted, alone, this is simply too much for our frail human nature to master on its own. We need heavenly help and earthly support. We need the power of the Holy Spirit and the encouragement of safe and trusted friends to hold us accountable.

Won't you take the Stomp out Gossip Challenge with me? Let's try it for a day and then build on that. Wake up and ask the Holy Spirit to put a supernatural block on your tongue. A block that acts as an alarm before negative words and comments are spoken. Once words are out, they stay out. There is no giant eraser that can vanquish our cruel comments. Don't I wish! Rather than say something negative about someone to another person, find a quiet place and talk to God. We can complain to Him. He tells us we can come to Him with any concern. He won't gossip.

That's it; one day without speaking negative words to anyone -- about anyone. Can you do it?

That also means when you're in the grocery store parking lot, and some rather rude woman cuts you off for a highly coveted parking spot, you do not turn to your passenger and complain about her. Keep the mouth shut! We can do this. So, what do you say? Are you with me?

I've said this before, and (forgive the cliche') but I'll likely say it again ... and again. We serve a God of relationship. We, as the body of Christ, are to be Christ's hands extended. We are examples of grace; lights in an often dark world. We need one another! So let's stop wounding our comrades, because as the title so simply states: Back biting leaves teeth marks. Worse yet, it hurts the heart.

What does God's Word have to say about gossiping?

Proverbs 16:28 NIV tells us:

"A perverse man stirs up dissension, and a gossip separates close friends."

What about 1 Timothy 5:12-13 NIV?

"Thus they bring judgement on themselves, because they have broken their first pledge. Besides they get in the habit of being idle and going about from house to house. And not only do they become idlers, but also gossips and busybodies, saying things they ought not to."

Or Proverbs 20:19 ...

"A gossip betrays a confidence; so avoid a man (or woman) who talks to much."

What's Love Got to do with it?

Happy (almost) Valentines Day!

The day when we honor love is drawing near. Men and women everywhere will run around searching for those just-right tokens of appreciation to give their loved ones this Sunday. Some will have somehow forgotten the special day and will find themselves stopping at one of those corner flower stands created with the Valentine "Forgetter" in mind. After all, giving a gift shows we love that special person, doesn't it?

Before I answer that question, I want to share about a young woman I know who loves her boyfriend. True story with the names changed, of course, as this tale isn't your typical love story, well, actually, it's far too typical these days. It's a story that I remember well from my own distant past.

We'll call this precious princess, Sally. Since I personally don't know any Sally's, except my daughter's friend's horse, Sallie, we should be okay honoring the privacy of "Sally."

This particular Sally is a single mother who has had to fight hard in order to break free from a number of torturous enemies. Primarily drugs and dysfunctional men. She has worked diligently to change her life -- for the better. Unfortunately, she has never been able to fully grasp her identity as a Princess Warrior who belongs to the ultimate King of the Universe. She's always felt unloved and lives in regret of her past despite the many people encouraging her and cheering her own. Sally has remained hungry for love.

A few months ago, she met a charismatic and handsome guy. He made her feel good. He made her laugh. He brought excitement into her life. All was good -- for a while.

Then the horror began. Suddenly, Sally became a captive to a twisted and dangerous form of false love. This new man-of-her-dreams took control of her life. He wouldn't allow her to answer her own phone or leave the house without him. He threatened and berated her. He became violent, even vengeful, and she was terrified. Things finally got so bad that she was scared for her life. This man told her the reason that he did these things to her was because: He loved her.

Some of you might be wondering why she didn't just get the you-know-what out of dodge. Or why she stayed. Why she continued to endanger herself and her son. Though, I also believe many of you can relate on a very personal level to Sally's misguided "love" relationship. We all know someone, if not ourselves, who has experienced a destructive form of love on some level. Maybe we haven't endured what Sally is enduring, but we understand. We need only turn on an evening drama or daily soap opera to see this type of relationship showcased to some degree. We are being programmed to think this type of insanity is a passionate and intense relationship. Some believe that fighting, at the very least, can liven things up. In actuality, it's destroying us.

My heart breaks knowing that many precious sisters will spend Valentines Day held captive by not only false forms of love, but also by relationships that have turned dangerous, even deadly.

I was so happy a few weeks ago, when Sally came to tell me how she had escaped the relationship, yet I could sense that she had lost almost all hope and that her idea of love had become skewed and distorted. She knew in her head that she didn't deserve such abuse, but by the things she said, I just knew she'd be returning to the hell in her home.

In my job, I see situations like this daily. I watch families torn to shreds by violence, addiction, and lies. I see wounded women accepting despicable treatment in the name of love. I was once one of those women. Thankfully, my story is one of victory not tragedy. I want all the "Sally's" to find healing and hope in Christ. Don't you?

Ladies, those of you who will celebrate this special holiday with a wonderful husband, fiance, or boyfriend -- rejoice. Remember to thank God for your relationship. For love is an incredible gift. And while your rejoicing, please remember those wounded women who are literally dying for love. Don't judge. Love.

We live in a world that perverts the meaning of love. Completely understanding the kind of love that God has for us, is truly beyond our comprehension. We get glimpses of it. We taste the sweetness of it. And someday, when we finally stand face-to-face with the Ultimate Lover of our Souls, only then we will fully embrace the grace, love, and mercy that we've been shown through Jesus Christ.

I know this might seem like a depressing topic for this holiday, but I believe God wants to remind His Princess Warriors that as women, created for loving relationships, too often we accept substitutes when it comes to love. Even when we are blessed with a fantastic, godly relationship, overflowing with God's love, we cannot expect that one person or relationship to fully satisfy our soul. There is only One who can ever quench our thirst for love -- God Himself.

In honor of the Maker of Love -- Make sure to spend some time in His presence this weekend. Give God the gift of your time, treasure, and talents. Worship Him and adore Him. After all, He is the Giver of the wonderful relationships you have. Maybe even design your own special Valentine's card for Him. Write a poem. Sing Him a song. It's not silly; it's simply a tangible way to show God how much you love and appreciate Him.

If you're in doubt about what real love "looks like," you'll want to reacquaint yourself with the following scripture:

From the New Living Translation:

Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. 1 Cor. 13:4-7

Do you remember that question I asked at the beginning of this post? Does giving a gift show we love that special person? Yes and no. Yes, certainly, a gift is a token or reminder of love. But even the most heartless abuser my give a gift, so indeed we could also answer no. So ...

to be sure you are demonstrating love, refer to the above scripture verses and act accordingly. Then you will be loving the way God tells us to love. After all, the greatest gift of love given us wasn't a bouquet of flowers to display, or a box of candies to snack on -- God's gift was a life -- His own Son's. Jesus died. He rose. And, we, because of this amazing gift, get the most amazing gift of love imaginable -- an everlasting life in the presence of God All Mighty.

Now, ladies, that's what I call love.

Please, take a moment and join me in praying for anyone suffering this Valentine's Day in the name of love:

Dear Lord,

So many women, men too, are experiencing horrible, even life-threatening treatment in the name of love. We don't know exactly why they're in this situation, but, You do. And regardless of the circumstances, You care. You love. Your desire is that we all experience real love that comes from a relationship with Jesus Christ.

You know and understand that letting go of a person or relationship can be heart wrenching, despite any abuse or poor treatment. We can become trapped, entrapped. Our lives can become endangered. You want to set us free in every way to experience Your love, Your hope, and Your future for us.

If someone reading this prayer is currently in an abusive relationship, please show that person Your love. Provide her with an escape plan. Place people in her life that can help. Guide her to the right resources and protect her and her children in the process. You have a plan and purpose for everyone reading these words. Please, give us all a glimpse of that purpose and plan.

Others may have no experience or understanding of the abuse process. Please give those sisters the desire to pray as the warriors they are for their wounded sisters. Give us all hearts of mercy, words of encouragement and hope, and the strength to pray often for the precious princesses still held captive.

This Valentine's Day we celebrate the Author of real love -- You! You, Lord, are the Lover of our Souls. We thank you for Your undying, never-changing love. Please help us show love to those you place on our paths today and everyday. In Jesus' Name we pray. Amen.

Together we can!

Greetings Princess Warriors!

I pray that all is well and that God's favor continues to shine upon you, bringing joy, regardless of your circumstances. May God fill you with His strength as you fight your daily battles. May He bring you victory after victory! Amen! I just had to pray a blessing over you. We just can't get enough blessings, can we?

So ...

The other day, I was finally able to visit the "Re-Gifting Store" near my place of employment in Vancouver, WA. I've driven past this unique business for the past couple of months but never seem to have enough time to explore the treasures waiting just beyond the cheerfully painted windows.

I don't know about you, but I like a bargain. I'd already heard this was a great place to find good deals, and that it was operated by good people, people who were helping people in the community make ends meet. Needless to say, I had a great shopping experience while listening to great Christian music. Yes ... this is a Christian owned and operated business that I highly recommend. I plan to do some volunteer work in the near future.

Anyway, as I was preparing to leave, I attempted (being the strong, capable, do-it-yourself kind of woman that I am) to carry all my purchases out to my car all alone. I had a grocery-sized bag of books, including plenty of hardbacks. (They let you fill up a bag of any books for five bucks!) I'd also grabbed a kitty-cat painting for my daughter and a super-cool leather bag.

Me with the bad knee and extra pounds was going to lug this all out without asking for help, thank you very much nice Christian people. Well, thankfully, those nice Christian people were having none of my self-sufficiency. A generous and highly capable volunteer lifted my load and helped me get settled. I was very grateful for the support. I couldn't possibly have made it on my own without breaking something, at the very least a nail.

Silly, wasn't it? Me almost breaking my back trying to accomplish something by my own not-so-super strength.

Seriously, though, how often do we try to do things on our own? How often do we get discouraged fighting battles alone, attempting to wield our swords when our arms are ready to collapse under the weight? Probably more often than we care to admit.

For me, it's especially hard to ask for help when I've made a mistake, when I've sinned or fallen short. I find that I'm ashamed and afraid to let others see me at my worst. Forget about God's grace, it doesn't apply in this situation, I falsely tell myself. Or, I'm facing a huge battle of some kind and I'm out on the battlefield all alone, too tired to lift my weapon and face my enemy. Not a good position to be in -- ever.

I'm so, so glad that this dismal picture can be completely re-adjusted with a little help from my friends.

Think for a moment about Moses. He was one powerful man of God when he allowed God to work powerfully though him. But even Moses didn't fight all by himself. In one of his many adventures, he and the Israelites faced yet another formible enemy -- the Amalekites. Moses stood on top of a hill with his staff raised high. When he kept the staff up, his army was victorious. When he lowered it, well, the results were not so good. Eventually, his arms got tired. I mean can you imagine holding up a huge staff, over your head, for hours on end? I couldn't even hold a bag of books for three minutes!

Thankfully, God had stratigically provided Moses with helpers. Listen to the story:

So Joshua did as Moses had said to him, and fought with Amalek: and Moses, Aaron, and Hur went up to the top of the hill. 11 And it came to pass, when Moses held up his hand, that Israel prevailed: and when he let down his hand, Amalek prevailed. 12 But Moses' hands were heavy; and they took a stone, and put it under him, and he sat thereon; and Aaron and Hur stayed up his hands, the one on the one side, and the other on the other side; and his hands were steady until the going down of the sun. Exodus 17: 10-12

These two men literaly lifted up their friend's arms. Moses didn't say, "Go away! I can manage by myself." Thank goodness for the Israelites that he was willing to share his burden.

Ladies, we, too, need others to share our burdens and to help us lighten our loads, and whatever those things weighting us down might be, God provides a way lessen our yokes, if we'll let Him. Our walk with Christ is a journey meant to be taken with other Christian travelers. And the battles we fight are meant to be won with friends by our side.

I understand how difficult it can be to humble yourself and seek help. We live in a world that tells us to pull up our bootstraps and hide our tears. But, in reality, what we all need is a person or persons that can hold up our arms when they become to weary to stay raised. Please, precious princess, just because you're a warrior doesn't imply you must stand and fight alone.

Moses, one of the greatest, godliest leaders of all time needed support. Why shouldn't we?

If your armor has become too heavy to put on, reach out. There is an armor bearer standing somewhere nearby who will help prepare you for battle. God doesn't want us to spend our lives struggling alone, oh no! He tells us where two or more are gathered He is in their midst. When God is in our midst, we can expect a victory. Lift us up, Lord. Lift us up!

Let Him Lead

Blessings, Princess Warriors! The New Year is well underway and already there's so much to share. First, I must acknowledge the tragedy in Haiti. I trust your prayers are with the precious people of that broken country. Miraculously, as with any tragic event, God is bringing light into a very dark situation. I'm not going to debate the "why it happened" questions, but, only say: God loves people. God can and does use horrendous circumstances to change lives, families, even nations. I will continue to pray for His provision and purpose in Haiti. I'd like to play a more personal role in the aftermath, unfortunately, that is simply not feasible unless God does some major rearranging and providing in my own life.

As for my own personal life, it was suggested that a dog might prove to be the perfect companion pet for my daughter. So, we are now the proud owners of a 10-month-old American Eskimo Dog. His name is Stryder and he looks like a fluffy, white, mini-husky. Too cute! All puppy. We've been watching dog training videos and my daughter is reading books from the library. The whole household is working to teach this precious pup how to be obedient. Well, let's just say, this process is not as simple as those video's make it seem. In fact, I feel like we have a toddler that moves really fast and barks. And although he's semi-house broken, he still has little "accidents." Despite these doggy challenges, we love our new baby. When he gazes up with those big dark eyes, you fall in love all over again.

However, one thing I've noticed is that he has great difficulty allowing us to lead him on a walk. If you're a dog owner, I'm sure you've experienced this at some point in your doggy- owning-career. Some dogs tug on the leash attempting to force their will on you. They don't want to follow, but would prefer to lead! If the dog is strong enough, it can drag you all over the place.

As I was observing this struggle between my daughter and her pup, I was reminded of how I react to God's directions at times. I, too, tug and pull, fighting to go the direction I want. Granted, our Heavenly King has power that we don't wield as human pet owners, but I think the similarities can serve our purpose of discussion.

God certainly doesn't drag us around with a leash, instead he extends his hand and asks us to follow him. He is the leader, we are His followers. He knows the best way to travel. He understands how far we can walk without overtiring. He is aware of dangers that we have no clue about. He cares for us and wants us to stay on the right path doing the right things, the things He has purposed and planned specifically for us individually, and as a body of believers.

Unfortunately, like Stryder (cute name, huh?) I have many ideas about what I think I should be doing. I want to go one way and God is leading me another. When I fail to follow his expert advise and guidance, I often end up face down in a puddle of muck. I waste time, energy, even money, and wish I'd adhered to my Master's leadership to start with. Ahhhhh ....! Can anyone relate?

Have you even seen one of those professional dog walkers? I'm amazed they manage to walk so many dogs at once. Good "walkers" actually keep their charges all going the same direction with minimal difficulties. They obey and heed their walker's direction. Imagine all the people God is leading, the major difference is that He doesn't leash us to lead us.

He offers His hand.

It's up to us to connect with Him and follow.

One of my ongoing challenges is to stop being like Stryder. Stop tugging, fighting, and attempting to do my "own thing" when it doesn't line up with God's best. God does know best -- always. My own best ideas have gotten me in a world of trouble of the years. When I slow down and listen to God through His Word, wise council, and prayer, I find the going a whole lot easier.

I suspect that when a dog struggles against its master's wishes, it can end up sore from its misguided efforts. I know when I choose to struggle against God's guidance, I can end up "sore" emotionally, spiritually, and possibly even physically. Taking the wrong trail can lead us places better left untraveled.

So, what do you say that we, as God's priceless princess warriors, spend less time on what we want and more time on what our All-knowing Father desires for our lives? We can truly trust His intentions and directions. Amen!?! Won't you take His hand? He's waiting.

His Word Says:

For this is the love of God, that we keep his commandments. And his commandments are not burdensome. 1 John 5:3 ESV

He who pursues righteousness and love finds life, prosperity, and honor. Proverbs 21:21 NIV

Come and follow me, Jesus said ... Mark 1:17a NIV

New Year: A New Work

Happy New Year, Princess Warriors. I know. I know. I’ve fallen behind (again) on my blogging. And God has given me ample ideas to expound on.

So, staying true to the new format, my personal update is quite simple on the surface. We had a wonderful Christmas. I watched the glittery ball drop on New Year’s Eve, while screaming well-wishers and New York party-goers looked on with animated glee. I didn’t have the same level of enthusiasm as the revelers in Times Square, but with drooping eyelids, I was still able to muster a “Happy New Year” to my family, and felt the nostalgia of yet another year and another decade passing. More importantly, I felt that familiar expectancy and hope that comes with any new beginning.

I took note of the many things I’m grateful for, and set my sights on running the race before me.

Okay, so that’s partly true, but there’s more to the story. I am bombarded by worries, concerns, fears, and more often than I care to admit feel my relationship with Christ could be far deeper. I beat on myself mentally over the many areas I fall short in, forgetting the extent of God’s grace and love for me.

Thankfully, as always, God knows exactly what we need. He certainly knew what exactly this princess warrior needed: a major reminder of the most basic truths: God’s Grace is enough. His work accomplished it all. If I believe in Him, I will not perish but will have eternal life. Good stuff to remember all the time. Unfortunately, we too often read the words of John 3:16 and don’t allow the amazing, life-saving message to sink into our souls.

My friend gave me a gift basket for Christmas. It was filled with all sorts of goodies. One of those goodies was a copy of Max Lucado’s book, 3:16 The Numbers of Hope. I would recommend this book to anyone. Granted, I love Max. He has a way with words that get to the heart of the matter, making God’s grace evident to readers like me who need a fresh reminder of what’s real and what’s not.

John 3:16, the universal verse that many people, both Christian and non-Christian can recite. Shall we?

“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”

As Max explains:

He loves.
He gave.
We believe.
We live.

That’s REALLY, REALLY good news for those who believe. Unfortunately, we, like so many before us, tend to complicate what God’s saying. We want to add rules and regulations like the Pharisees of old. We don’t admit it, but we somehow believe that something more is required. How could God possibly love us that much?

When we sin, He so generously provides a way out. We don’t have walk barefooted across hot coals, or scourge our own bodies. We confess and trust that His sacrifice was enough if we will but believe and be born again.

We have, as Pastor Lucado so rightly points out, written our very own Bible verse: “God helps those who help themselves” (Popular Opinion 1:1) He goes on to say: “We’ll fix ourselves, thank you. We’ll make up for our mistakes with contributions, our guilt with busyness. We’ll overcome our failures with hard work. We’ll find salvation the old-fashioned way: we’ll earn it … Christ, in contrast, says to us … ‘Your part is to trust. Trust me to do what you can’t.’”

Ladies, I don’t know about you, but I have spent time, way too much time and effort, trying to be “good enough” for God, when the Only One good enough is Jesus Christ. He did all the work that needs doing. We simply need to be believing.

This year, this new decade, is wide open before us. As daughters of the King we have yet another opportunity to reign real, brining hope to an often hopeless world, and love to people who feel unlovable. Unfortunately, if we are unable to except God’s gift of grace, and the new life it brings, we will be unable to share His Good News with those around us. When we waste time trying to “work off” sins that have already been forgiven, we discount God’s mercy and call Him a liar.

Strong words? Yes. True? You decide.

Maybe you, too, need a refresher course on God’s amazing grace. It’s so easy to get caught up in “being a good Christian.” We are busy, busy, busy, but are we busy for the right reasons?

Why not take a few hours and read this book. I know it reminded me why we need to celebrate. We really are free from sin and death. We truly have a hope and a future. We are children of a God who loves His family and was willing to sacrifice everything to gain our love.

So, if your Holiday Season wasn’t everything you hoped it would be, please, remember God is everything He promised to be. And that is something (Someone) you can place your trust in.

The Cracked Mirror

Christmas is almost here. Wow! The birthday celebration of our Savior, Jesus Christ. He truly is (forgive the cliche') the REASON FOR THE SEASON.

I've been so blessed this Holiday Season. My job has provided a number of free tickets to incredible productions like, The Nutcracker, Narnia, and Big Little Things. My daughter and I have flitted from one play to the next, enjoying dancing, music, and drama, three things that delight and entertain us. I've never experienced such a wonderful taste of the arts in Portland. I am impressed. Big time.

One thing I noticed, always, while in the lovely restrooms at these events, was the amount of time women stood looking in the mirror. In fact, I remember reading somewhere (I wish I could remember where and when) that women look in the mirror, or windows, OR anything with a reflection, hundreds of times daily.

What are we looking for? Sure we check our lipstick, smooth down that out-of-place hair, and even wash the lunch crumbs away ... but, I think there just might be something more to our fascination with our own reflections.

Remember the evil queen in Snow White? She had a mirror that continually fed her a lie. For she was most certainly not the fairest in the land even before Ms. Snow White showed her pretty face on the scene. The Queen's mirror had a nasty fibbing streak, didn't it? Leading his wicked ruler to become disillusioned with her reality.

On another level, apart from movie magic, we all have a "mirror," something inside us that reflects back everything good, bad, and in between that has happened in our lifetime. Words spoken, actions taken, mistakes made by us and against us. If we stare into our mirror long enough, we can be certain to see something we don't like. For most of us, our mirrors are cracked. They don't reflect the truth about who we are and who we belong to.

We hear a lot about self-esteem and self-image these days. To often we spend untold amounts of money and time on improving our so-called image. We work hard to fix the outside when the blemishes we are really trying to cover are the ones on the inside. Focusing on our self-image can leave us empty or even shallow. I'm not saying we shouldn't be positive and work on improving ourselves. Not even close! But what I am suggesting is that we spend less time in the mirror and more time in The Word focusing on our God-image. That's right. We are made in God's image. In other words, parts of Him reside in us. If we'd take the time to know who He is and what He has to say about us, we'd feel less concerned about some old cracked mirror.

The funny thing is, when we embrace our God-image our self-image improves. Ladies, we are royalty, Princess Warriors, children of the most high God. We are worthy women of God. Listen to what He has to say about us:

And I rejoice over you with singing. Zephaniah 3:17
My thoughts toward you are as countless as the sand on the seashore. Psalm 139:17-18
Because I love you with an everlasting love. Jeremiah 31:3
You are fearfully and wonderfully made. Psalm 139:14
I chose you when I planned creation. Ephesians 1:11-12

Let's spend less time listening to lies and looking in the mirror, and more time looking to God for our worth. After all, our identity is found in Him.

God loves you. He treasures you. He has adopted you. You are created in His image to do great and marvelous things. Don't believe anything or anyone that tells you otherwise, even the mirror in your mind. Replace the the negative with God's truth and start reigning real right now!

Secret Sins Saturating Society

Whoever conceals his transgressions will not prosper, but he who confesses and forsakes them will obtain mercy. —Proverbs 28:13

The old cliche' "You're only as sick as your secrets," has more merit than you might believe.

You need only glance at the face of a child who is hiding something ... Scrunched features. Mumbling. No eye contact. Cocked head. Silly smile. They each have their own cues that inform us that they have a secret that needs sharing.

Just this evening, I was watching an evening television show with my daughter. It was absolutely fascinating. Ask me the name of the program and I won't be able to tell you. Sorry! Anyway, it was all about a group of seasoned law enforcement and military personnel whose jobs included using specialized interrogation techniques and getting a person to confess his or her crime.

They showcased taped interrogations and provided commentary while the conversations were taking place. For those who ended up confessing, their whole demeanor and body language shifted once the truth was out on the table. Suddenly, all their protective strategies were discarded and the tension left their bodies. They actually appeared to be relieved despite the fact that a life in prison, or, in one case, the death penalty were the rewards for their disclosures. Apparently, though, confessing their crimes provided relief from some of their guilt. I think we all know that pretending takes a lot of energy. It's stressful to keep a secret.

What led me to this challenging topic? The recent Internet stories about Tiger Woods and his alleged affairs. He has admitted to hurting his family with his actions. The truth is out now. Unfortunately, for his family, the whole world knows about his secrets.

The Bible explains in clear language that if we chose to conceal our transgressions we will not prosper. But, thankfully, for believers, we have something (Someone) the rest of the world doesn't -- complete forgiveness available through Christ Jesus.

We all fall short and sin. We all make mistakes. We've all kept secrets. God doesn't want us bound up by lies and secrecy. He wants us free to be all we can as His Princess Warriors. It's more than a little difficult to reign real when we're covering our faces in shame. Secrets cause shame. And I've discovered over the years, no matter how hard we try to keep something hidden it eventually gets found. After all, whatever goes on in the dark is eventually illuminated by the Light.

God is already well aware of our secret sins. We live in a society riddled with wounded women who are cowering away from confession, afraid to reveal their secret thoughts, actions, or words. I know when I was a young wild child, I used to get confused because I couldn't quite keep track of all my secrets. I considered myself a pretty adept liar. I know. Something to be proud of ... not even! Today, I've invited the Holy Spirit into my life and have asked that He shine the light of truth brightly on any secret sins I might be concealing. His conviction leads to confession, which leads to freedom.

Are you burdened by a secret sin? Is it time for you to turn to Jesus for forgiveness? I love the explanation of this process written by Dr. Robert Luginbill:

Cleansing from Sin: As believers, we have already been "washed" clean of our sins, that is, forgiven and pronounced holy by Christ's work when we accept that work by faith (Eph.2:5-9). But although we are clean and pure "in Christ" (1Cor.6:11), it is still possible for our feet to pick up a bit of dirt as we walk about in the devil's world. God has given us the status of "holy people", but we are still imperfect and still capable of sin.

We must therefore be alert to the fact that as long as we sojourn on this earth we shall always be vulnerable to personal sin, and we must be ready to confess it whenever we become entangled in the "sin which so easily besets us" (Heb.12:1). This is the point Jesus made when He washed the disciples' feet before the last supper (Jn.13:1-17).

Peter was unwilling to allow Jesus to wash his feet along with the other disciples. But when Jesus told him that without the washing of his feet, Peter could have "no share" in Him, Peter demanded that the Lord wash his body also. Jesus replied, "One who has had a bath needs only to have his feet washed, otherwise he is completely clean" (v.10). Our Lord was telling us that we are in need of only one release from the bondage of sin which has held all mankind under condemnation since Adam, and that this release or "redemption" was provided by His death in our place and appropriated by us through our faith in Him (Col.2:13-14).

This is the "bath" or cleansing from sin which has already been accomplished and need never be repeated. We do, however, continue to commit acts of personal sin as believers, and when we do, we are in need of "foot washing", that is, of the forgiveness and restoration which comes to us when we confess our sins to God. We need to be washed from sin only once. We need to cleansed of our sins as often as we commit them.

I hope this entry has prompted you to stay current on confession. God isn't here to interrogate us, but to love and forgive us. Why don't we let Him?

Vampires, Werewolves, teenage love … oh my!

Hello all! Long time (again) since I’ve blogged. That’s all about to change. It’s time for this Princess Warrior for Christ to start encouraging and challenging other Princess Warriors to be all they can be as daughters of the King. When I challenge you, guess what? I end up challenging myself to live life for Christ on a deeper level. It kind of works like that doesn’t it? We tend to teach what we need to be taught, or we get to share about things we’ve overcome by the grace of God.

So, the new format will be as follows.

At first, you may get a little update about my personal life.

Secondly, I will pick a topic or theme related to Christian living, an attribute or behavior that brings God glory, and expound on that. I may also feature a theme that relates to something we might be better off avoiding, if you know what I mean.

At least one scripture will be referenced and I will include a real life story or anecdote that helps us better embrace the topic, OR I’ll write a fiction scenario to depict what we’re exploring. If there is a resource or book that might help us in relation to the topic, I’ll make sure to share it with all of you. With that in mind …

Why wait? Let’s start, shall we?

My personal note: It is Thanksgiving evening. I am thankful for so many things … my relationship with God, my family, and friends. My job. My home. My ministry. I really, for the most part, like my life. Despite the financial challenges (and they’re big ones) and issues with my kids, I am still grateful.

When I had the swine flu something happened spiritually speaking. My misery drew me closer to God, the only place I could find even a smidgen of comfort. I did a lot of silent praying and God in His perfect wisdom responded in ways that continue to astound me. I’m getting ready to head out of town with my daughter. We were invited to travel with a dear friend and her daughter who is the same age as mine. Road trip! Tomorrow, bright and early, we’ll be on our way to Klamath Falls, Oregon. We’ve heard there may be some of that cold white stuff covering the ground. Just the potential of snow has the girls in a tizzy. Personally, I’m okay with a book, fire in the fireplace, and the gorgeous view we get to soak in. That’s my new news in the condensed format.

I’m sure some of you are bemoaning your over-stuffed bellies and wondering what vampires and werewolves have to do with our Christian walk. Add teenage love to that and it sounds like I’ve lost my mind. Stay with me.

None of us can fully avoid the latest phenomenon that’s running rampant in the media – Twilight, New Moon, the Cullen family of vampires, and a pack of handsome young werewolves, are on the minds of more than a few gals – both young and older. Much older! I’ll admit that I, too, have seen the movie and read the books.

When you have a preteen who is eager to embrace what society is spitting out, you tend to take it upon yourself to investigate. After reading, I’m not so worried about the war between vampires and werewolves. I think most of us are pretty clear that that particular battle won’t be happening anywhere but on the Big Screen or in the pages of the nation’s bestselling book series. Seriously, I’m not bothered by all that. What concerns me, big time, and more so with the latest movie installment – New Moon – is the addictive, codependent nature of Bella’s (the heroine) and Edward’s (vampire love interest) relationship.

Do I need to give background? I doubt it. I suspect if you haven’t see the movie or read the books, you know enough about the storyline to follow along.

For some reason, I really noticed the problematic theme to their relationship in this newest movie. They’ve been dating now for some time. She is human. He is a vampire. Good girl. Bad boy. We all know that story. There’s just something that seems to be engrained in most women that leads us to desire (secretly for the most part) that “bad boy” image. That’s a topic I don’t even have time to start on.

Anyway, what I noticed as I sat through the first half of New Moon was the pathetic, anguished, never-joyful love Edward and Bella shared. Geeze! If it hurt so much why bother? That’s the problem, though, isn’t it? From soap operas, to nighttime dramas, romance novels, and the Big Screen movies, we’ve been conditioned to think that being in love mean being in pain. Even when Edward and Bella kiss they look like they need a strong pain killer. Where’s the joy? Maybe a big smile now and then might be nice.

I know. I know. Some of you are saying, but Carol they don’t have sex and teenaged love is mushy, after all. That’s great. I can appreciate those points. However, when Edward leaves, we are forced to watch Bella dive into a depression so deep she can barely keep from drowning. And I don’t mean for a few weeks, or even a month, but for months and months and months. She becomes the walking dead. Her whole existence is wrapped up in her feelings for her vampire beau. She even starts to do crazy, dangerous stunts so she can hallucinate about him, and people find that romantic. Scary, huh?

Granted, she’s not the only one looking gloomy. Edward apparently can’t function either. In fact, he plans to kill himself when he believes that she is dead. This whole Romeo/Juliet love thing, with suicide as an option, is just plain evil. When we put a person and relationship ahead of God, we’re in big trouble.

This movie sends a very specific message to young girls everywhere. When you’re in love, nothing else matters but the object of your affection. You can’t possibly survive without that person. Love is supposed be filled with pain, heartache, and anguish, along with strong doses of insecurity and fear.

Am I making too much of a teenage love story? I don’t think so.

God’s Word says specifically:
“Do not worship any other gods besides me.” Exodus 20:3 NLT

When our world revolves another person, place, or thing, we are quite simply said: worshipping that person, place, or thing. Some people worship their wealth, others their careers, and some their cars, the list could go on for miles. For many women, men and relationships are the focus of their worship. If we feel that we cannot survive without a certain someone or something, we just might be in trouble.

I’m not downplaying real love. Godly love is a beautiful thing. Godly love is good for you, though. Consider the following words about addictive love versus what the author calls authentic love:

ADDICTIVE LOVE SAYS:

1. I can’t live without you. You give my life meaning.
2. You make me feel valuable. When I am with you, I am somebody.
3. I can’t make it on my own. I’m helpless without you.
4. I want you to be a total part of my life, and I want to be a total part of yours.
5. All of the hard times are worth the good times. I will be here forever, no matter what happens, no matter how terrible or harmful you are for me.
6. I can’t bear to think of you sharing your thoughts and feelings with someone else. You are the only one who has ever understood me.
7. You should be sensitive to all my needs. I have feelings you should take into consideration before you do anything.
8. If you really care, you will treat me the way I want. Your job is to make me feel good.

AUTHENTIC LOVE SAYS:

1. I can live without you, but I chose not to.
2. I am a valuable person, and you affirm that value to me.
3. I can make it on my own. Having you as part of my life makes it easier, or more fulfilling.
4. We are two separate people with two individual lives to lead. I encourage you to pursue interests, and I will pursue mine. This kind of space and diversity is good for us.
5. I believe love should seek another’s highest good. To the best of my ability, I will do that for you, even if sometimes I fail.
6. We are richer for sharing our lives with other people. I encourage you to have other friendships.
7. Mutuality is the glue that holds us together. I enjoy you, and in that enjoyment, I find that many of my needs for importance, belonging, and intimacy are met.
8. I will accept the way you show me you care about me. Sometimes I may have to ask you about your actions, but generally, I will take at face value what you say and do.

I wish I could give credit to someone for coming up with those descriptions, but I can’t for the life of me recall where it came from. It makes some very valuable points that both non-Christians and Christians can both easily relate to.

The Bottom line remains: As Princess Warriors for Christ, our love and attention, first and foremost should be on our Heavenly King – Jesus Christ. He is the ultimate Source of real, authentic love. We can never think too much about Him. When we’re filled with His love we are better equipped to truly love those around us. He will also give us the strength to continue when we lose someone we love deeply.

My final thought: If you plan to watch the Twilight saga with a younger woman or teenager, why not discuss the nature of true, healthy love and where it ultimately comes from – an intimate relationship with Christ. In addition, point out that being in love isn’t supposed to be filled with excruciating, gut-wrenching pain. Our special person should lift us up, bring us joy, and most importantly draw us closer to God.

Comfortable in the Common

Life. It's so full of ups and downs and all-arounds. We can get pulled in a million directions at once and run ourselves ragged. As you know, in my case, a certain oinky flu slowed me down for a few weeks. In fact, I'm still not quite 100%. However, thankfully, I have truly discovered some major benefits in the midst of this season of sickness.

I have been spending a ton of "down time." Basically, I just do the basics. I go to work. Care for my family. Relax and rest. It's as if being sick has allowed me the freedom to slow my hectic pace down and feel okay about it. I didn't realize how much time I spent "doing" rather than simply "being." I teach on this subject a lot, but, apparently, I wasn't heeding my own advice. (Big surprise!)

Anyway, I've spent more time recently in God's Word, doing Bible study, devotionals, reading for pleasure, and just visiting with my family. In addition, I've been resting and sleeping more without the guilt. And let me tell you, the benefits are plenty. I'm feeling more stable, God-centered, content, well-rested, peaceful, calm, the list could go on. These are some pretty nifty goodies from God. Before I felt over-burdened, busy, bossy, and more than a little bratty if we're sticking to "B" words. I'll leave one "B" word off the list, but I'm sure you can use your imagination. I was biting at people (especially) my family. Snarling some too. Not a pretty sight for a Princess Warrior (or anyone) for that matter.

Growing up, I was addicted to chaos. I had to be caught up in a whirlwind of craziness to even feel alive. I was on the constant search for something or someone unusual or different to to add excitement to my life. For those of you who know my story, that included drugs, partying with rock stars, having a multitude of dysfunctional relationships, and living on the edge in everything I did. Being home alone, relaxing and reading ... major boring back in those days.

Granted, as I've grown up in Christ, I've become far more content with my life regardless of the circumstances. My quest for happiness and cheap thrills has changed dramatically, yet, I was still rushing around and busy doing. Getting sick brought my life to a screeching halt; I can still see the skid marks. Needless to say, going from doing everything to nothing in the blink of any eye had a major impact, an impact that I'm only beginning to understand.

God uses every experience as a learning one, if we let Him. He has allowed me to find such joy in the common everyday things. Sometimes we need to slow down. We need to give ourselves permission to rest and relax. Life is overflowing with stressors. Why would we want to add more stress to the pile? The crazy thing, we often keep doing the very things that cause us frustration and we avoid what will help us feel better.

I found out that God can slow me down anyway He so chooses. I'm not saying He caused me to get the flu, but He has certainly used that experience to get me refocused on Him and what's important.

Is is time for your to refuel? Fill up your spirit? Get some rest? Do you, like so many of us, find it difficult to give yourself permission to take a day off from the rat race?

Well, consider this your personal permission slip to slow down and get comfortable in the common things. What you'll discover is a whole lot more of what's uncommon in our world -- peace. You don't have to be bed ridden with swine flu to slow your pace, you can do it right now. Put your own brakes on and reach for that cup of tea, a journal, your Bible, and a good book. Or, stop what you're doing and go to bed! Yes, you heard me right. Get a good night's sleep or a nap. Your body will thank you.

This encouragement, friends, is coming from a woman who has written articles about Ministry Madness ... yep, I wrote about that topic more than once. I didn't feel spiritual unless I was doing something for God. For the first time, I truly think I understand what it means to simply be with God. Now that I've slowed down enough, I just might find out what I'm actually supposed to be doing for His Kingdom.

Go ahead, Princess Warrior, relax, rejuvenate, and renew.